DC Universe hates normal life: Pitfalls of not having superpowers probed

John Eppard, IV Leader A&E Editor

When people fantasize about living in comics the thing they dream about is having superpowers and saving the day.
However, if you don’t have superpowers in the DC universe, what is happening is that you are living in a world full of oddly dressed people with the powers of gods (and Batman) and you are unable to do anything about it.
Chances are if you most likely have a job and work for a living, you would think that you would be able to work without any worries other than the inside drama at the job while living in the DC universe.
The unfortunate thing, however, is that you would have very little job security due to the fights constantly going on.  The amount of collateral damage that happens during the fights Superman has would have the mayor banning Superman from ever entering the city to prevent any more damage.
The odds of a business being destroyed in the crossfire of one of these fights seem to be even higher if it’s a grand opening of a bank or hospital because I’m starting to think that the writers at DC just like to troll.
When you think about it, the unemployment rate for Metropolis must be out of hand due to the lack of enforced laws against vigilantes.
The only job security there may be would be for construction workers and even that would lead to dire consequences.
Eventually one of the construction workers would be tired of the long hours and constantly having to rebuild the same building over and over again.  The man will become beyond furious and make a cheesy oath of revenge on Superman because since he’s living in that universe he can’t help but be overdramatic.
After months of saving up money from the long hours of construction work, the man would buy equipment to fight Superman or help Lex Luthor.
Needless to say Superman will win the fight and the poor construction worker will be broken spiritually and be thrown into jail…which he will probably escape from because security guards are terrible in the DC universe.
In the end, normal people are helpless in the universe DC has created which makes me thankful I live in a world without ultimate power.